Dating Misadventures: Her Sister Took a Picture of Me With My Junk Out of My Trunk…

Here’s a story that people on Quora love and by far my favorite story, edited with additional info. Here ya go 🙂

I was literally caught with my pants around my ankles before…

I matched this girl on the Tinder app and we talked. We seemed to have online chemistry and we swapped numbers. Nothing too special so far.

This was before I had my messaging process down so we never had a date scheduled (you can get a free mini course which includes the messaging process for free here).

But then a few days or so later I get a text at 2 in the morning asking me what I was doing…

My face when I was woken up to this text message

Me: “Nothing… what are you doing?”

Her: “I may be drunk texting you…”

So ten minutes later I’m driving to see this girl.

Nothing too out of the ordinary yet, but I do notice that my car is a little low on push water and I am driving a good half hour to see my new fun friend. What’s more, I’m slowly developing a serious case of dry mouth and am getting thirsty.

Arriving… 

When I get there, there are little town-home looking duplexes lined up. Inside they have an upstairs that leads to one of the living areas and the downstairs one is right underneath the stairs of the first. It’s set up to be similar to an apartment complex, but with houses and only two ‘apartments’ per house.

On the way there she texted me which duplex to go into and to wait inside the door. When I get there I text her that I’m there and waiting by the door, more than a little thirsty and really anticipating more than one drink of more than one tall glass of water this momentous of humid mornings.

Not twenty seconds after texting her I hear a click as a door unlocks… she steps out standing around 5ft8 with long blonde hair and wearing a lime green tanktop and a green-ish short skirt. Can’t remember what footwear she was sporting but I want to say flip-flops, but can’t honestly remember. She might have even been bare of foot.

After gingerly closing the door of her apartment she skips down the stairs of her apartment and immediately starts making out with me.

No words.

No pleasantries.

No how are you’s.

Just her lips on mine and our hands all over each other.

In my fevered pitch of horniness my hand goes up her skirt to discover to my absolute delight that she’s not wearing any panties and she’s already soaking wet… oh my… you naughty, naughty minx.

Awesome! Good times so far but like I said, on my drive there I developed a little bit of a dry mouth and I really need a different glass of water before indulging in the pleasures of this one.

Me: “Hey I’m thirsty, let’s go upstairs”

Her: “No. Do you have a car?”

Me internally: Lol no I teleported there and I’m thirsty woman!

I didn’t even have a chance to respond as she’s leading me out the door and asking which car is mine.

That’s the car that’ll get me in trouble right over there

Cool, so we’re in the car where things are getting hot (literally and figuratively) and heavy (luckily not literally since she’s on top). Pants went down, things went places.

So far so good.

But as she’s getting more and more into it I start getting overheated which takes away my enjoyment and I’m still thirsty! Where’s the Waterboy when you need him??

About the same time as my lack of proper hydration starts making itself very apparent something in my lizard brain tips me off to danger. And when I look out the window I start seeing this flashing light roaming around outside.

Me: “Dafuq is that?”

Her: “Don’t worry about it, baby. Keep going don’t stop I haven’t been fucked in ages”

I’m young, dumb and full of cum at this point so I don’t worry about it and do my best to keep going.

But not long afterwards the fog and heat in the car gets too thick for me and my happy, wet and willing soldier and combined with my ever increasing need for a drink I decide to tap out and get some air.

So I open the car door saying that I need some air to keep going. She climbs out first happily replying that we can go behind her house.

Okay, works for me (I had forgotten about the flashlight, but was about to be reminded).

But just as we both get out, at roughly 3 in the morning at this point, this god damned flashlight comes out of nowhere and centers right on me. She doesn’t see this and is trying to pull me away to the back of her apartment complex and I’m half-running half-staggering penguin style behind her with this flashlight aiming right for me.

I’m Literally Caught with My Pants Around My Ankles

Fan-fucking-tastic.

Now, even though I’m feeling like a young stud at this point in my hero’s journey, I start to go over a few scenarios in my head.

And not a single one of them good…

Internal me:

FUCK!

It’s her husband.

Dammit that’s why I couldn’t go upstairs for water.

Shit shit shit shit shit fuck!

He’s walking towards me so he hasn’t shot me yet. So I have that going for me, which is nice…

But what do I do? What CAN I do!?

I’ve seen those fight me pranks so maybe he’ll run away if I go after him with my dick hanging out?

No, he’s gotta be upset enough where he won’t care.

Dammit!

Does he have a weapon? I can’t tell…

Shit!

And just when all hope seemed lost I hear the voice behind the flashlight, still unable to see who it actually is:

“What the FUCK are you doing *her name here*!?”

Wait… was that a woman’s voice?

No, I can’t be that lucky.

It’s a guys voice and his voice is cracking from the anger. It’s gotta be.

Her: “Oh hi sis! What are you doing up?”

Oh thank you lord baby jesus! It’s a woman! And she’s like 5ft! And doesn’t have a weapon and is barely covering herself with her robe! I can take her if I have to, hotdog in or outside of its package!

Hey… she’s not bad looking either… I wouldn’t mind taking her too…

We Get a Verbal Talkin’ To – Finger Wag and Everything

And you’d BETTER make sure to cradle the balls and stroke the shaft!

So the sister starts verbally abusing the both of us. My good time gal’s skirt hides her, kind of, but my junk is still out of my trunk and just hanging around.

Plus, I’M STILL THIRSTY AS HELL.

Poor me… nobody cares that I’m dying of thirst over here…

The sister takes a picture of me (barely managed to cover myself in time) and my car and tells her sister to come back upstairs.

“You’d better send her upstairs because I’ve got your license plate, you pervert!”

Oh, sure… I’m the pervert. So says the lady with her tits and vajayjay nearly  hanging out of her robe taking a picture of a naked stranger…

My new flashlighty friend then leaves (sadly she wasn’t inclined to join us and I wasn’t nearly ballsy enough to ask at this point) and my good time gal pulls me to the back of the apartment complex to finish up and send me on my merry way.

We proceed to date for a few months for fun until she gets a serious boyfriend and I never got my friggin water and almost ran out of gas on the way back!

Talk about a rough life, makes me thirsty just thinking about it…

And if you are having any issues with your own Tinder stories then tell me in the comments. I’m here to help 🙂

Keep Moving Forward
-Alexander

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